ume

You thought me new.
I thought You forgot about us.
You thought me through,
And I thought we were.
You thought me right,
I thought I was wrong,
So wrong,
Too wrong,
for You.

You see me true
But I only see what lies in me.
You see me whole
But I see incomplete emptiness.
You see me clean
But I feel as filthy, filthy ragz.

You pursue me
Even though I'm way out of line.
You pursue what we have always had.
It's never left me.
You pursue me as if I'm valuable.
Am I valuable?  You say I'm valuable!

You trust me
As if I'm strong.
You trust my weaknesses,
I guess cause I trust Your strength.
You trust that everything
Will be o. k.

bday

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Yahweh 9142013

 

Shelly - Jered - Cameron

Smorez

at Yahweh September 14 2013

A Mid September Nights Dream!!

ARMISTICE

ARMISTICE

lyrics and music by Jered Feldman

I don't mean to hurt you, I don't mean to try

I don't even mean to ask, "why"?

I'm searching for answers as if they exist

"How is this my fault", I beg, I insist.

A plug.  A bandage.  Whatever in life can manage

the cuts, the scars, bleeding throughout the bars.

The gashes, the ashes in the win death flows as chaff

And when the howls and screams shout louder I still can't help but laugh.

I don't understand why.  Don't know what makes me tic,

but ticked, I get, when the tic's inflict more treatment undeserved, meaning

You don't deserve blame and neither do I

but when I'm told "This my fault", I crack under pressure.

I didn't mean to hurt you, I didn't think I tried.

Maybe I don't think at all?  For that I 'pologize.

I've searched Truth for healing. I plead for armistice.

Warfare's still 'round me and, no, I didn't start this.

You're not my enemy, I'll stop hearing you as "they".

I will lay my life down, again, 'cuz, it will absolutely hurt no more.

bgan: 9/7/13 bdone: 9/9/13

unrejected

http://smorezarific.tumblr.com/post/57858294366/i-wanna-know-that-your-love-will-over-whelm-me-and

I wanna know that Your love will over whelm me and Your grace is a home to welcome me and not imprison me.

I wanna see You running to me because You’ve missed me.  You’ve set a place at Your table.  You’re still smiling!  But I am crying.

I wanna hear that Your forgiveness cost me nothing.  You’ve paid my way in.  Shouts of, “We’ve missed you, it’s been so long”.  I’ve missed You All.

I wanna feel I’m no more empty filled with acceptance.  Enourmous 4’s to hold on tight.  You hold my hands then show me Yours.

I wanna be who You say I am: Fearfully made and Wonderfully too.  You are the Potter.  I am the clay.  A broken vessel.

You take my guilt (I am set free: a new creation).  You take my trash, ‘tis no more mine.  Am I worthy to be Yours?  I am.

I am unrejected!  I am unrejected!  I am unrejected!  I am unrejected!

http://smorezarific.tumblr.com/post/57858294366/i-wanna-know-that-your-love-will-over-whelm-me-and

talent vs effort

what are you contributing to the band?

each member of a band has talent.  if they didn't, they wouldn't be part of the band.  but some members think that is all they need to be part of a "team" "band" or "group".  that is not true.  usually what comes with talent is "selfishness" "conceit" "arrogance" "overexpressiveness" "my way or the highway attitude" "zeal" "passion".
of all those characteristics, passion seems to be not so bad.  but even passion, if not used the right way, is not as good as it could be.  "never put passion before principle".  so what is the principle of a band?  to never put ones self above another or the rest and definitely not above the crowd or the audience or the listeners.  so lets talk about each of those attributes that can be paired with talent.

selfishness:  this happens when the talented member is blind to the skills of everyone else in the band and not only that but they don't ask for help or assistance from any one else in the band.  for instance, "i wrote this song" and no one else is gonna play with me on this one.

conceit: this happens when the talented member acts not like they're better than the rest but that no one is as good as they.  there is a huge difference.

arrogance:  i'm really the best of our group and i don't need any assistance to believe that or show that.

overexpressiveness:  this is a "something to prove" attitude.  always having to explain the songs and they're meanings and "if you wanna now more about my lyrics, come and talk to me".  oh yeah, i've done that too.  

my way or the highway:  "i'm gonna show up at practices when i want to.  what are you gonna do about it"?

zeal:  this says, "you have to appreciate my music because it will change you"

passion:  this says, "events have impacted me and so now my music expresses that and you should be impacted just as much, if not more"

understanding:  this speaks for itself.  understand?  ha ha

acceptance:  mano y mano

i believe a major contributor to a band is "effort".  not just in word or deed but in both, working together.  effort in communicating.  effort in appreciating.  effort in affirmation.  effort in understanding.  effort in kindness.  effort in living.  effort in principle.  effort in knowing the Truth and being set free.  effort in understanding boundaries.  effort in knowing order.

being in a band can sometimes be hard stuff.  but all things are possible.

October Jackpot Music Hall